Saturday, June 18, 2011


I haven't posted here in a bit because nothing much is happening.  But I guess that in itself is something I need help dealing with.

I'm just kind of existing.  In limbo.  Separated, but not divorced.  No real end in sight in that, either, since her lawyer is doing whatever she can to stretch it out.  Just going to work and doing my job and spending time with my kids and doing what I do at church. And hanging out with friends.

Which is all good, but I'm so used to moving towards a goal that I'm really uncomfortable with not having a plan.

And I can't really have a plan because I have no idea what is coming down the pike, and a lot of the moving on I need to do has to wait. 

So, I'm in limbo. 

I'd like to, at some point, start moving towards dating again.  But I really can't until I'm actually divorced, nor do I actually know how to go about that anyway.  I'd like to get moving towards some financial future where I'm not living in a little apartment and penny-pinching to get by.  But I can't until I have some idea of what my financial fate will be.  I'd like to start thinking about maybe taking classes again, but that, too, has to wait on financial decisions and such.

I hate this.