I don't really know why. Well, yeah I do. Kinda'.
I miss my wife. Yeah, she was evil and mean and made my life hell, but at least she was mine and I was hers. There was someone to whom, whether she liked it or not, I had to be the top priority. As she was mine, like it or not.
And now I'm not anyone's priority. I have friends. Good friends, who are wonderful people and who care about me, and would do anything for me. But they all have other priorities that are higher. It's not wrong - in fact, it is the only way they can make their choices in the right way. It's not their fault - any of them. It's just the way it is. But it hurts all the same.
I don't know how to be this person. I don't know how to live this life. I don't know how to do this.